Confident Mom · Mommy Style · Self Care

Let’s Build | Dump the Frump Style Series Week 4

If you’ve been following the series this month then you know we’ve done a lot over the past few weeks! As we get into our final video for the series, I want to remind you… it doesn’t have to be difficult to look and feel amazing in what you wear in the body you have now, while you work towards the body you want.

When you get clear about how you want to look and feel, and take the steps to purge what doesn’t belong, you’ll have made room to build and add items in that align with the vision you have for yourself.

And we build with two main ingredients…. basics items and coordinating pieces!

Watch week 4 to find out more!

Check out this other amazing video on the topic! 5 Essentials for Moms on the Go!


How I’m working the process in the moment!

My wardrobe word for the year is “effortless”, and anything that doesn’t align with this vision for my wardrobe doesn’t belong. PERIOD.

Check out this quick video GRWM: from in the house to running errands. Here I’m sharing how I build one of my fave looks using basic items and coordinating pieces!

First I want to say… your girl isn’t playing about keeping this simple in this postpartum season. That all black situation in the beginning of the video… I own 5 of them! 5 pairs of stretch pants, and 5 camis with the shelf bra. With

And at any giving time during the week you’ll find me in this exact look! I call these my “basic pieces”. I own the same look in grey, brown and navy blue.

I love my basics because they are flattering, make me feel amazing, and are practical for my SAHM lifestyle. I’m still nursing so easy access to feed my little guy is a must. I also have an active toddler so wearing comfortable and chic clothing in which I am able to move is nonnegotiable!

Now, when it comes to school pickup/drop off, running errands, and even meeting up with my people, I have a beautiful assortment of coordinating pieces that help me to elevate my look EFFORTLESSLY!  From Dusters, Jackets, furs, down to my sneakers and boots… all of my coordinating pieces keep me snatched, while giving me the functionality that I need as a mom.

I keep the 3 Ps in mind when I think of how to add pieces into my wardrobe: Placement, Pockets, and Patterns!

Placement: Placement is everything, and will determine whether you look or feel frumpy or not. High waisted vs low rise. Fitted vs oversized.  Everybody is different so you have to decide what works best for you. For me, I ensure that when layering my items during this fall/winter season, they flatter my body. I don’t want anything that makes me feel bulky or frumpy in my wardrobe. When it comes to “The placement” of the items you’re adding into your wardrobe ask yourself, “will these items flatter my body”?

Patterns, Prints, Pops of Color: As I mentioned my basic items are nuetral colors (black, grey, brown..etc), so the majority of my coordinating pieces have prints and patterns that make my look POP! Mixing patterns in to go with your basics in black, brown…etc will take your look to the next level. So as you’re building don’t be afraid to use pattern, prints and pops of color to bring your look to life!

Pockets: We all get hyped about dresses that have pockets, but I am in a season of my life where I need pockets on everything! On of the things I LOVE about my stretchy pants (that carried me through my entire pregnancy), is that they have POCKETS! As a mom pockets are a must. My pants have pockets, my jackets have functional pockets! Pockets are an essential part of  #momlife!

Okay, so now it’s time for you to get to work. Like I mentioned in the video, identify your basic items and coordinating pieces and the build your looks! If you loved the looks I’ve shown, check out my Postpartum Fashion Faves here!

I would love to hear from your and feature you, right here on my blog!  All your have to do is let me know how you’ve “Dumped the Frump”, and send a photo of yourself in a look you were able to create while using the steps in this month series! All entries can be sent to by 12pm on Monday 2/27/23. 





Just getting started… Follow the series here!

Intro: How to feel amazing in what you wear (after having kids)

Week 1: Get a Vision

Week 2: Time for a Wardrobe Purge

Week 3: What Lies Beneath

Week 4: Let’s Build

Mommy Life

Our Trip to Sesame Place + A Lesson on Expectations

Y’all I learned a serious lesson about expectations over the past few days while away with my family. I learned that if not properly set,  and checked regularly, they can literally ruin a good time.

Let’s explore shall we…

So we decided to visit Sesame Place for some summer time fun. My little lady has been somewhat obsessed with Elmo the past few months, so I figured it only made sense for us to see him in person.

So I got our season pass, booked two nights at a nearby  hotel, and planned to have everything packed and loaded for  our adventure.

Well the day arrived. I got everything packed, and my little one surprisingly breezed through our nighttime routine. We we all set to drive through the night (during her bad time). All we had to do was wait for daddy, pack the car and head out.


Y’all… once little miss got into that car… things got a little wild. I expected Dream to sleep during the 3 hour drive at night, but sis was looking like 👀 👀👀👀 for 99.9% of the ride. She basically said “these eyes ain’t finna close til we get where we going”! Lawd! Talk about a LONG drive!

After a long night (driving and in the hotel trying to get our little lady back to sleep), we all woke up refreshed and ready for our day. We met up with my sister who was joining us for the day, and made our way to Sesame place.

I expected the park to be nearly empty, but quickly realized I was wrong as we pulled up to see droves of people pushing their strollers and lugging their bags across the walkway. I’m like isn’t this a weekday? Isn’t the school year approaching? Isn’t this a pandemic?  Talk  about a total shock!

We get in, get our tickets, and I try to ease all the pressure by assuring myself that Dream was going to love it when she saw Elmo and all the rides! I expected her to run, skip and play. But sis was in observation mode most of the time. She wasn’t excited about no rides, barely flinched when Elmo came out… and seeing all those people… She was NOT IMPRESSED!

With all of this going on, I also expected my husband to have all the answers. I was tired, and didn’t want to think about anything anymore. But this… taking a toddler to an amusement park… was a brand new first time experience for both of us, and we were both figuring it out as the day went on.

It. Was. A. Whole. LOT!

I’m so grateful for my husband’s patience and  for Aunt Jess helping us to go with the flow, because with the way I was feeling idk we would have left sooner rather than later lol. (THANKS GIRL)

Here’s a glimpse of our day!


It wasn’t until that night, that I realized I needed to check myself. I apologized to my hubby, and just sat with God for a few moments to release all the pressure and frustration from the trip. I seriously don’t like it when things don’t go my way. I was disappointed, but I also knew I wanted to posture myself to learn from this moment.

The next morning, after prayer and talking to my therapist, I realized that I didn’t leave room for the “what if”.  I just expected things to go my way, and when they didn’t… I didn’t have any type of recovery plan in place, which led to my frustration and dissapointment.


I expected my little lady to sleep through the night on our drive… but I didn’t have a plan for what to do if she doesn’t.

I expected for my little lady to have the time of her life… but I didn’t prepare for how I would respond if she didn’t

I expected my husband to take over… but I didn’t communicate my needs or prepare for what to do if neither one of us had an answer

You see expectations aren’t bad, but we must be super careful that we are being realistic especially when we put those expectations on others (especially on our children, spouses and loved ones). I am an optimist by nature, I’m also learning when you travel with a toddler ALWAYS HAVE a back up plan… ALWAYS!!!!

I can’t control the circumstances, but I can control how I respond. I can also  have a plan (or two)  in place for what to do if things don’t go as expected.

I won’t get got again.