A few weeks ago a Facebook memory popped up from my stories that made me cringe a bit.
For reference… it was a 6 part story thread posted 2 years ago. I was going on about my goals as a “mompreneur” and I remember just how pressed I was to prove I still had it all together since becoming a mom. Now, don’t get me wrong, I did have some “mom things” figured out, but what I remember most is how I felt this immense pressure to perform and show up in this self proclaimed “mompreneur” role, and over time it became an exhausting expectation I placed on myself… show up for the people. Whew.
Now let me tell you a little bit about what was going on at that time. Just a few weeks prior to that 6 part story thread, God made it explicitly clear that I was to step away from my then Hair Slayed By Reese styling business, and I just felt like I had to immediately step into “doing” something else. Something that I could call “purposeful”. I was determined to keep up appearances. As much as I claimed to be walking in my purpose, the truth is I was more concerned with looking the part, as oppose to actually aligning my life with who God was calling me to be.
A year of that went on! Yes a year of pressure, people pleasing and trying to prove myself! A year of following all the gurus’ advice, trying to launch and pitch and position myself as an expert because I desperately wanted to be seen as important and successful… and it was exhausting!
Fast forward to today, and guess where God has me? Guess where I found my freedom from all the pressure, and my purpose in this season? I’ll give you a hint… it has nothing to do with trying to prove how successful I am.
I’m a full blown Stay at Home Mom and Wife and I’m embracing that as where God desires for me to be in this season. Prioritizing God above all things and pouring from my overflow into my family. God showed me that this is my first ministry, and that the road I was on previously wasn’t leading me to a place that He desired for me.
Since embracing this space and season (which let me tell you has not been easy), I found myself more present with my daughter, husband and myself. I’m more prayerful about the things concerning our lives individually and as a family! I’m more aware of what’s taking place with my husband and how to be his helpmate. And the time freedom is beautiful!
Scripture has become more alive to me than ever before. Like verses I’ve known and memorized, have breathed new life into this season of my journey. I’m also more present and aware of who I am in Christ (especially without all of the titles, praise and need for validation). This is particularly important since I used to be so afraid, embarrassed almost, when people used to ask me “what do you do”. I’ve even experienced a bit of “shaming” and side eyes from other moms when I shared that I’m a stay at home mom and wife (more on this another time because it’s deep and needs to be addressed).
Now I know this is a special place, and a privilege. I remember praying for this life, and now I see it for the blessing that it is (even with all of the challenges). I am the CEO of my home, and I’m learning to love it here. And anywhere that God places you is always blessed!
It’s all about God and His timing, and actively flourishing where I’m planted until it’s time for the next thing!
I know this is not everyone’s story. I’m connected to more working moms and mommypreneurs than I can count. But I must tell you that no matter what “work” you find yourself doing, the only work that will bring about an everlasting reward is the work we do for God. And you’re a wife and a mom… that always involves putting Him first in all that we do, and tending to our first ministry. Our homes.
Being pressed to show up (show off), and perform is not it. Hustling and overwhelming yourself to create a booming business, while your home is in flames is not a part of His plan for your life. Of course, this doesn’t mean don’t build your empire or work outside the home. Nonsense! Listen God has already given me a vision of some of the things I will do in the marketplace, and I’m excited when the time comes.
This is all about obedience.
This is all about prioritizing our lives in such a way to ensure that we are aligned with who God is calling us to be in every season! Even when others don’t get it, or think we can “do more” because they see us as “gifted” and “called”. We have nothing to prove, when it comes to obeying Him.
We all need to do a heart check, and often. The way society is set up, it is so EASY to spiral down the wrong path. I encourage each of us to pray and ask our Father “is the work I am doing aligned with Your will for my life? Am I living for an audience of One? Or am I pressed? Purely responding to the pressure to perform and please others?” And if you find that anything is out of order, ask Him to open your eyes to see so that the necessary changes can be made in my life, today in Jesus’ name!
Obedience and aligning our lives with Him, in EVERY SEASON, will always be the way!
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